Published: August 1, 2025
By: Susan Rosser
Why I’m not jumping out of planes… yet
I don’t have a bucket list. I’m not sure why, but that’s the truth of it. And every time I hear someone say, “Oh, that’s on my bucket list,” I can’t help but feel a pang of envy, which leads me back to the question: Why don’t I have one?
It can’t be too arduous to make a list. In fact, the challenge lies in completing the items — making the list is the easy part. Unless you’re me.
I know that if I were indeed in possession of such a list, but failed to check off each item, the disappointment would be unbearable. Still, I can’t help but wonder: Without an actual list, will I ever do the things dream of?
People with bucket lists always seem to be the adventurous sort — leaping out of planes, driving race cars, riding in hot air balloons. My version would be far tamer. I’m more of a stay-at-the-Four-Seasons-in-Bora-Bora kind of gal. I have zero desire to ride horses on the beach. Actually, I have zero desire to ride a horse anywhere.
The truth is, it’s not skydiving that scares me. It’s failure — failure to follow through.
I’m a list maker of the highest order. At any given time, I’ve got at least three: the daily list, the weekly list and one I call “imminent.” Each task gets a tidy little checkbox, and few things in life bring me more satisfaction than coloring in those tiny squares.
So what if I get to the end of the road (forgive the euphemism) and some of my bucket list boxes are left blank? Would I perish from disappointment alone? Maybe. But now that my kids are grown, I find myself looking back and wondering: Did they ever see me dream out loud? Or did they only see me in task mode — doing, managing and crossing things off? There’s beauty in that, of course. Raising kids requires a million unseen checklists, and I was pretty good at those. But I hope they also got a glimpse of something more. I hope they saw the little sparks — the daydreams tucked between soccer practices and science projects — even if I rarely gave them the space to catch fire.
And now? I suppose the spark is mine to tend to again.
I could come up with a completely doable, low-stakes version of a bucket list. But would that be cheating? Isn’t the point to push yourself — to leap, to soar, to chase something bigger than your everyday?
Still, maybe having a list — any list — helps us walk a more interesting path. Life gets tangled up fast in errands and obligations. Maybe a bucket list nudges us off autopilot. Maybe it gives us permission to dream. Or better yet, maybe it dares us to create opportunities instead of waiting for them to float by.
So, while I’ve been resistant, I’m starting to believe that having a bucket list is a good idea. Sometimes we need a reason to do something out of the ordinary — even if that reason is simply coloring in a box.
See you in Bora Bora.
Susan Rosser is the editor of South Florida Family Life. She originally wrote a version of this column in 2017, yet she still doesn’t have a bucket list. Do with that what you will.
